Anything that interrupts the parent-child affectional bond or the normal path of socialization is harmful. What injures the mother/child bond will, in turn, weaken the male child’s ties to his father, which later hampers connections with same-sex peers. Wounding can happen much earlier than can be remembered, and its impact on children can vary.
The following is a dramatic example of the effects of bond disruption. Ted Kaczynski, who came to be known as the “Unabomber,” had evolved into a recluse. Why? What could have happened that encouraged an apparently bright, well-educated young man to become so warped and withdrawn socially?
The first clue is something that happened when Kaczynski was only six months old. According to federal investigators, little “Teddy John,” as his parents called him, was hospitalized for a severe allergic reaction to a medicine he was taking. He had to be isolated –– his parents were unable to see or hold him for several weeks. After this separation, family members have told the feds, the baby's personality, once bubbly and vivacious, seemed to go “flat.” [p 29]*
Humans are built to flourish through emotionally attuned rapport. Relational disorder or havoc young children experience is profoundly disturbing to their developing psyche. Such irregularity can render male children unable to become psychologically aligned with their gender role. They do not become sufficiently masculine to see themselves as no different than other boys.[1]
*Flores, Phillip J., Addiction as an Attachment Disorder, 2002, p.103.
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